THE FIRST 15 MINUTES OF MY SATURDAY TODAY

Here are some things I learned this morning. Some of it came to light the minute I opened my eyes. The rest took about 15 minutes. Here’s a list:

  1. A toilet can stop itself up in the night, even if not used and not stopped up the night before.
  2. Silverfish traps can disintegrate and move themselves to a completely different room
  3. Wet cat food that’s been in the refrigerator will explode in a microwave within 15 seconds.
  4. A dead mouse in a trap too long in hot weather can make your entire house smell like an outhouse.
  5. Songs often run through your head , over and over again, and today mine is “You Gotta Start Off Each Day With a Song, Even When Things Go Wrong.”
  6. When your Word program indents itself automatically and numbers lines, you sometimes cannot move your text back to the left margin.

IMG_1176On my recent birthday, officially making me “elderly”, my husband gave me a gorgeous rose quartz pendant that is supposed to have energy that can, among other things, make positive things happen in your life. It is now around my neck, even though it doesn’t remotely match the outfit I have on.

 

 

First thing I did when I got to the kitchen, IMG_1159before the exploding cat food, is make coffee. I have nearly consumed my first cup and desperately need another. It’s in the cup my daughter, Barb, gave me for my birthday and is right here beside my computer. It says: “ If I wasn’t so tired, I’d come over there and totally slap the crap out of you.” It did make me smile when I just took a minute to read it again and that’s the first smile of the day.

I’m off to the kitchen to refill this cup, so have a great day, my friends!  And by the way, so many people have thought I am upset, but I actually wrote this tongue-in-cheek, thinking all of it was pretty funny, even though it’s all also true.  I’m humming that song and happy.  Just wanted to share some humor with all y’all.

Author Jackie Taylor Zortman

Author Jackie Taylor Zortman

Author of award winning fiction novel FOOTPRINTS IN THE FROST and non-fiction book WE ARE DIFFERENT NOW.

 

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About jtzortman

Author of "WE ARE DIFFERENT NOW" - A Grandparent's Journey Through Grief and first place award winning novel "FOOTPRINTS IN THE FROST". Contributing author to anthologies "Felons, Flames & Ambulance Rides", "American Blue", "Recipes by the Book: Oak Tree Authors Cook" and "The Centennial Book of The National Society of Daughters of the Union 1861-1865". Numerous articles, poems and short stories published since 1990. Charter Member of the Public Safety Writers Association and member of Rocky Mountain Fiction Writers. Winner of ten writing awards. I live in a quaint Colorado mountain tourist town with my husband and Siamese cat. When deeps snows blanket the terrain and spectacular views from my windows, it becomes the perfect spot in which to write.
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14 Responses to THE FIRST 15 MINUTES OF MY SATURDAY TODAY

  1. Oh my, and then those perfect lyrics on top of it all! Thanks for the laugh 🙂

    • jtzortman says:

      Finally, someone realized I meant it to be funny. It actually was. As I say so often, Nancy, I can always count on you. Thanks for commenting.

  2. marilynm says:

    Life does that sometimes!

    • jtzortman says:

      Yes, it does…more often than not. Thanks for letting me know you came by. I guess most people feel I was upset, but I actually thought it was funny, which is why I wrote this.

  3. mmgornell says:

    Gosh, Jackie, sure hope your Saturday improves! Keep that smile on your face…

  4. jtzortman says:

    Thanks, Mad. Actually, I thought all of this was funny and I wrote the blog “tongue-in-cheek” as the cliche goes. Thanks for stopping by.

  5. Peggy says:

    I’m laughing! The cup is perfect. And can so relate to dead mouse smell. You know how tiny the porch is and we had one out there we could not find. Ugh and yuck! Enjoy your Saturday in your pretty necklace.

  6. jtzortman says:

    It’s always good to know somebody else understands these things. RB just bought some version of a roto-rooter to unplug the toilet. If this doesn’t work, my daughter-in-law has one down at the 4J that’s bigger. It was windy around 3:30 AM and I’m guessing a paper cup got blown in there and then flushed. Hope your storm damage has been cleaned up and you can also enjoy your Saturday. I’m wearing the necklace for the positive energy it’s purported to possess.

  7. Barbara Shepperson says:

    It’s always good to know that you aren’t the only one to have these things happen. Glad we can see the humor in them and can keep on keepin’ on!

    • jtzortman says:

      Yes, I totally agree. Misery loves company, as they say. 🙂 It’s kept on going to some extent, but I’m so used to it now, I barely notice. Just got home from Eric & Jill’s house and it looks like it’s going to rain. Lordy, I hope it does!

  8. I thought I was having a bad day…guess not!

    • jtzortman says:

      And it just kept right on rolling the entire day. Luckily, I was able to laugh my way through it, which isn’t always the case. My BFF called and we chatted on the phone for a couple of hours about other things, so that surely helped. Glad you stopped by and left a comment. Thank you!

  9. Olivia Milton-Piatek says:

    Sometimes I think we have the same mysterious mojo going on. Sent you a letter to explain….if I wasn’t so tired, I’d laugh!!!! Love the accounting of your morning.

    • jtzortman says:

      Sharing that strange “mojo” is likely part of what makes us BFF’s. 🙂 Yes, I read your text last night and answered it. I had to stop in the middle of my answering text, so you have two from me. My Saturday just kept on and on after I wrote the above and yesterday was not so hot, either. Hopefully, today will be less hectic. Hugs.

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